By Simon Brown

13th May 2020

Categorised in Mental & Emotional Health

As a carer, you are much more likely to feel stressed at times given the number of responsibilities that you have. Over time you may begin to feel increasingly frustrated or angry. What is important, though, is that you are aware of the things you can do to minimize your anger if it begins to get out of control. But how do you know if the anger is, in fact, out of hand?

Signs of an Anger Management Problem

  • Difficulty controlling emotions
  • Either engaging in or thinking about being violent
  • Argumentative
  • Feeling irritated or annoyed with many people
  • Lack of patience
  • Possible feelings of depression due to an anger problem

Five Tips to Help Control Anger

Use “I” statements

When an issue comes up with someone where you feel the need to speak your mind, using “you” statements, such as “You never help me around the house” or “You don’t do your part,” may come across as very confrontational. This can cause tension because it sounds like an accusation, which may lead to an argument. Instead try using “I” statements, such as “I feel really upset because I have to do everything myself around the house” or “I need some more help from you.” This will allow you to approach the issue in a way that is not as confrontational while still allowing you to speak how you feel.

Think before speaking

When you’re angry about something, it is very easy to just say what’s on the tip of your tongue without fully thinking it through. This can cause


Exercising can clear your head of angry thoughts while also improving your physical fitness! The next time you are feeling particularly angry about a situation, try going for a run, walk, or bike to give you time to think and clear your head.

Control your breathing

Sometimes something as simple as taking a few deep breaths can make a huge impact on how you are feeling. If you come across a situation where you feel your anger growing, count to 10 and take some deep and relaxing breaths. Chances are that after you do this, you’ll emerge feeling more relaxed and more composed so that you can handle the issue in a more constructive way.

Know when to ask for help

If you feel you are unable to handle your anger on your own, it’s okay to reach out for help! Seeing your GP, attending an anger management course, or seeing a counsellor are all options that are available to you.


Need more support?

If you have recently lost the person that you care for and are struggling to cope, Suffolk Carers Matter is here for you. We offer free support, advice, and guidance and even have a free counselling service available should you need it!


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